Book Review of
Autism Parenting: Strategies for a Positive School Experience
by Connie Hammer, PCI Certified Parent Coach®

In the introduction Connie tells parents why she wrote this outstanding book:

“I wrote this book to help you do everything you can to make sure your child arrives at school ready, willing, and available for learning. What happens when your child is at school is not as easy to manage. But doing what you can before he arrives at the school’s doorstep will make his school experience better, and help make his teacher’s job easier.”

And as it turns out, “doing what you can” could add up to significant positive changes for children and parents both with the 300+ practical and proactive ideas in this book. Based on brain and behavioral science, they cover a broad terrain to ensure all areas of the child’s life and mind are comprehensively addressed—including academic concerns from the first day of school onward to socialization issues with how to help your child understand distinctions between best friend, playmate, and acquaintance as well as what to do about bullying. Covering the entire academic year, the book also includes a sensible section on the summer months, “A Brain-Healthy Summer.”

Connie is particular equipped to write such a practical, useful guide. As a parent educator, behavior consultant, and PCI Certified Parent Coach®, she has worked extensively with families and children for more than 30 years. Her undergraduate degree and MSW, as well as the seventeen years she worked as a K-8 social worker, bring a unique background and an integrated view to the child’s school experiences. Connie is a tireless advocate for families. In 1985, as an advocate for abused children, she founded a nonprofit agency in Maine to prevent child abuse, currently known as Healthy Kids

In reading this book, you will soon see Connie’s big heart shining through in every word.

To obtain your copy, please visit conniehammer.com.

What I appreciate about this book includes:

The Format

Short-to-the point chapters with a Review Checklist at the end enable busy parents to read within a short time limit and then go back and consider key points. Ideas are highlighted, standing out from the text in an easy-to-access way. Scroll until something jumps out to try is often a realistic strategy for overwhelmed parents.

Connie Speaks Directly to You

Reading the book, is like having a chat with Connie over a cup of tea or coffee. She continually encourages with empathic understanding of the myriad of challenges parents face today. She asks parents thoughtful questions every step of the way. Here is an example of what I mean:

“When the overabundance of parenting information leaves you lost and confused, it is human nature to readily accept what your closest contacts are doing. It’s easy to embrace their suggestions, especially if they seem to be working for them. But the important questions to ask are:

‘Is this really what I want?’
‘Does this feel good to me?’
‘Does this fit with my values and who I am?’
‘Do I really know who I am?’”

The Book Oozes Positivity with a Can-Do Attitude

“Before you read on, or skip to the parts that are pertinent to you, please take a moment to commit to staying focused on the positive, and believing in your power to empower your child. Set your expectations high, but remain realistic. Never assume your child cannot do something, and always presume competence—in yourself, and in your child!”

Progress Tracking and Self-Refection are Integrated Throughout the Book

One example:

“To keep yourself on track, you can daily ask yourself the following questions:

When you wake in the morning, take a few minutes before delving into the day to mindfully consider, ‘What do I want my child to learn today?’

Throughout the day when you are faced with parenting decisions, ask, ‘How are my actions teaching my child what I want her to learn. How is it helping him develop the qualities I want him to have as an adult?’

Upon tucking your child in at night, take some time to reflect and ask, ‘What did I teach my child today?’ ‘What values did I help my child to develop?’”

Empowers Parents

Ultimately this book is about empowering parents for supporting their child’s school experience—something that they are not directly in control over but what Connie makes very clear: Parents have significant influence on their children’s school experiences. For instance, in discussing how helpless parents feel about their child’s making friends at school, Connie assures parents:

“Parents often seek professionals or school personnel to teach their child social skills, but there is much you can do on your own. Accept the fact that you are your child’s best teacher to accomplish this task—you do it every day without realizing it.”

With clarity and a direct, kind approach, Connie provides a comprehensive guide for parents to know more about themselves as they support an optimal school experience for their children.

Writing about Autism Parenting, Bobbi Sheahan, co-author of What I Wish I’d Known About Parenting a Child With Autism, states, “Connie Hammer’s advice to parents of children with autism is compassionate, sound, and from the heart.”

I wholeheartedly agree. And know you will, too!

Copyright © Gloria DeGaetano, 2017. All rights reserved.

Gloria DeGaetano is the creator and CEO of PCI (Parent Coaching Institute and Parent Coach International).